Thursday, August 16, 2012

Return of the Gandolf Quotes

Gandolf and I watch a lot of Hulu and Netflix. But not all of her great lines are TV related.

While looking out the window recently she said "I'm so happy."
A few minutes later she said "Let's see what they will eat." I think she has plans for the sparrows.

I don't know what was going on in her head, but I got a random "My butt's sorry".

Me - "Yummy's on the phone. Anything you want me to tell her?"
Gandolf - "Dip de dur dip de dur dip de dur."

Gandolf ran through a whole bunch of tones bouncing up and down the musical spectrum. I said "That was awesome, Gandolf!". She said "Yeah. I got it."

Gandolf has a switch that she uses to turn her radio on and off. After listening for awhile she said "Awww shut up." and flipped off the radio.

The Claw, Yummy's cat, came out of her bedroom after a nap. Gandolf says "Hi, cat."

Yummy had been watching Gandolf while I was out of town. Yummy moved a towel that she'd been using to hide some books and found one of her hard cover books was missing about 15% of the cover. Gandolf had not only eaten the cover but had replaced the towel. Yummy turns and says sternly, "GANDOLF! What. did. you. do?!" Gandolf replied "Don't. Eat. The book."

For some reason Gandolf just started a monologue that occasionally mentioned "Birds of war".

Gandolf was yelling at some Howard University truck that beeps when it backs up, telling it to "stop it", "quiet"!
She does the same with the conures when they get too loud.

She took off from the back of the couch and flew to her perch. The conures did their usual "BIRD! HOLY SHIT! DANGER!" noises. Gandolf said "sorry".

Gandolf has a thing about dogs. She loves them. Hallmark was selling a toy dog that barks when it hears certain key words. The commercial shows a mother and daughter reading a book with the toy dog. It was really setting Gandolf off. The dog barks and then Gandolf barks.

While Yummy was house sitting some extra cats Gandolf started talking about the cats. Lots of garbled syllables, but there was meowing and something that sounded like "...because he's a boy." The boy cat had certain... er... generous masculine endowments.

Gandolf is gonna blow. She sounds like a bomb in a movie counting down to detonation. "Boop. Boop. Boop. Boop. Hello. Boop. Boop."

"Three Four Five. Gonna kill that brat. Six Seven Eight. That's a good dog."

Me: I just got a big box with your name on it.
Technically, my name, but it's coming to you.
Yummy: A big box?!
It is a great dane puppy?!!
me: If so it needs bigger and more air holes.
Theresa: Hmmm...
Is it a new car?!
me: I suppose if we put it together ourselves and it only needs to fit you.... sure, why not.
Me: Gandolf was giving your box the eyeball. Now she's trying to engage it in conversation.
Theresa: The box with my puppy in it?
me: The puppy/car. Yep.
Theresa: Tell her, NO!!
me: Don't talk to the puppy/car?
Theresa: Don't CHEW the puppy/car!
me: No, no. She just want to chat it up.

Gandolf turned off the radio and said "stop".

Gandolf is clucking up a storm. She was head dancing to her own chicken sounds.


Gandolf just called me a "fool". "Garbled jabber babble, FOOL!"

Mom has a tiny dog named Hannah. One day Gandolf and I are disagreeing on what a dog says. She started doing Hannah barks and I was imitating her. Then she asked what a dog says and I still did a Hannah bark. Gandolf corrected me with a deeper woof.

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