Deep in the bowels of the house

Awhile back I mentioned I was doing work under the house. [link] I've been applying an insulating paint that I won't get into again here.

The nice thing about the underside of the house is that it's cool down there. A good place to be on a hot summer day. I'd been thinking about going under the house Monday, but I thought a nap seemed a better idea. A nap followed by a good night's sleep. So Tuesday I got myself psyched up and went under with a small bathroom trash can half filled with paint and a 3" wide brush. I still had the light run down there so all I had to do was crawl from the back of the house to the front of the house. About ten feet in you can switch from your belly to your hands and knees.

I spent just under two hours generously applying multi-ceramic paint to the underside of the living room floor. The house is about 13 feet wide and I covered the space between the first three floor joists. So, what, the first 4 feet or so?

I came back out with several artifacts left by previous residents. By that I mean rusty metal cups and ceramic pitchers and the like. I left behind several artifacts left by previous construction crews. By that I mean beer bottles.

I was also covered in dirt. I mean seriously disgusting. I could sell these pants for $150 in a popular clothing store.

I plan on going down once a week until it's done. I need it done before it gets cold and I've been slacking off.

The next day I came home expecting to be met at the door by a wave of cold air. Did I mention that after 3 years I've turned the AC on again? Yummy was planning some major housework but you don't really want to do that at the house's natural 82° and humid summer temperature.

My point is that I didn't get that wave of cold air. The house was 82° and the fans were blowing like mad. Out back the AC unit was off.

Ok, the odds are that I hit something down there. I try the trick that sometimes works. Shut it down for half an hour or so to give it a chance to rest. No dice. It wanted me back under the house. See, there's some rather thin wires that run from the general climate control center in the house out to the cooling unit outside. Something was likely wrong in there.

I couldn't find the flashlight so I grabbed my replica Sonic Screwdriver, a knife, and some electrical tape. Only about a foot under the house I found the problem. An electrical situation that would make most real electricians wanna slap the bejeezus out of whoever wired it up. These are thin wires twisted together, capped, and electrical tape applied 6 inches from the exposed wire. The wire had broken. So, Sonic Screwdriver gripped firmly in mouth, I removed the cap, stripped some wire, twisted the wires, and covered them in a copious amount of electrical tape. Now I'm the guy who needs to be slapped. There's no real danger, but the wire really needs to be contained in some protective metal tube so I can't kick it and rats can't eat it.

Next time my brother, the electrician, is unemployed I'll bring him out and get him to crawl in the muck.

P.S. My fix worked. The AC is on.