No linky

Either my allergies or my allergy meds have pretty much eliminated my ability to read more than a few words at a time. So you get no links. But here's a conversation I recently had.



I was sitting on my front porch reading when the neighborhood drunk came over.

Drunk: Hey, Pr'fess'r. Whadda ya teech, again? 

Me: Huh? I'm not a teacher.

Drunk: Sure. Yur a pr'fess'r. Whatt'r you a pr'fess'r 'f, any-way?

Me: I'm not a professor. You just call me that because you see me out here reading or working on my laptop all the time. 

This was followed by an hour and a half of him talking about venomous animals, how he's 10 times smarter than me, and how he could kill me any time if he wanted to.