Thursday, September 20, 2012

The lesser house

Annapolis Bog
Due to people out in Minnesota or Michigan (or some large state starting with M out west) failing to fill out their paperwork and send it back, I wasn't able to finalize the paperwork on the nicer of my two houses yesterday. The other house, however, is all mine.

Here's the house that will henceforth be known as Annapolis Bog. I call it that because it's on Annapolis St and is extremely wet inside. The gypsum board ceiling in the front room has fallen. There's mold growing on the floor. Less fluffy mold is growing on the walls. The koi pond in the kitchen is completely unplanned.

I went back to the house after getting the keys. I wanted to move beyond the front room and see what else was going on. I can see the water in the kitchen. Through the front window I could see a hole in the roof. But that's about all I knew.

I texted Yummy and told her to expect a text every few minutes. If I stopped then something had gone wrong and she should send help. With that established I prepared to move beyond the front room for the first time. I put my foot through the door way and on the floor. I slowly started putting weight on the foot.

Yummy got a text message saying "nopenopenopenopenopenopenope".

There was no sound, but you should imagine the floor making a squelchy sound as it yielded easily to my foot. It was not unlike stepping on soaking wet cardboard. The first step was a complete failure.

I returned to my car to dwell on the dwipping dwelling. Maybe if I put down plywood or particle board I could walk through the house. Then I'd know what size it is and work out a new floor plan. Or I could call the contractor I plan to use on my other place and ask his advice. I kinda feel bad doing that since I'm not sure I'll be using them for this house.

Any thoughts on how to navigate this house sans death?

3 comments:

amj523 said...

If you have an aluminum ladder long enough to reach a spot that should have support you could run it across the floor. You could even place boards on top for a wider pathway. Or break out your Spidey webs.

Ibid said...

I tried the webbing. All the mold on the walls kept it from getting a good grip. Good thought, though.

GreenCanary said...

The "nopenopenopenope" text made me laugh so hard that I peed a little. True story.