Friday, April 27, 2007

Murderous rampage

The impulse to mete out a little old west justice strikes us all from time to time. Maybe it's when your boss gives credit for the project you spent two years on to the mailboy. Maybe it's when the teacher gives everyone in class 100% because he's too lazy to bother grading the projects individually. Maybe it's when you returned to the DMV for the ninth time because there's always one piece of paper you need that they refused to tell you about before. Maybe it's that telemarketer that has called your for the fifth time in three days with the same offer each time.

My dream rampage right now involves ad-ware. Some little program slipped onto my PC that keeps giving my computer unwanted commands. Most of them involve opening Internet Explorer and going to websites I don't want to see. I could get behind some porn but these are just ads. Much of the time it doesn't open a website, but tried to put a shortcut on my Desktop, modify my Registry, or download programs. I got some programs to remove spy-ware and ad-ware, but the problem continues. I crippled Internet Explorer and that fixed the problem, but then Firefox stopped working.
What I want to do is spend a day sitting in front of the computer writing down every single company that places an ad with the ad-ware people. Then I find the Board of Directors for each of those companies, rent a car, and tour the country leaving a wake of blood soaked CEOs, COOs, CFOs, and marketing directors and torched office buildings. I'd leave a printout of their pop-up ads nailed to the door of each of their homes so everyone would know exactly what their crime was and hopefully to discourage other companies from repeating those mistakes.

What about you? What's going to make you snap and who is going to suffer for it?

1 comment:

TlalocW said...

I don't know what's going to make me snap, but I figure if and when I do, I'll probably have to head for New York as the one person who bothers me enough to get my Irish up (and I'm Polish so that's extra hard) that I want to punch him in the face is Bill Donohue.

Other than that, I'd like to find the various persons posing as Russian women who keep replying to my online personal ad telling me they like my "structure." I'd really like to torture them into telling me just how their stupid scam is supposed to work.